November 29, 2012 by Leanne Vogel December 13, 2018
Why am I here? What am I meant to be doing? What gift have I been given to share with the world?
Although these are some massively scary questions, we owe it to ourselves to live the life we were born to live and I truly believe that our hearts know what that truth is. We just have to listen and brace ourselves for the answers.
Me? I’m drowning in questions, dreams, opportunities and a deep desire to define my purpose. But other than being pulled in a bunch of different ways, I’m not really sure how it all fits together.
I feel like something big is coming. I have my hook out, net in hand, waiting for something, searching for anything. I’ve been reading a book a week, meditating twice a day, doodling business plans, planning backpacking trips around the globe, searching for workshops, opening myself up to yoga, working with a vocal coach… I don’t know what I’m looking for but I’m on the hunt for answers and I’m ready to accept whatever comes to me.
This hunger began when we moved and it’s been getting stronger with each passing day. I know we were supposed to make this move, but I don’t know why. I feel lonely, get discouraged often, indulge in a couple of bold cry sessions weekly, doubt myself, question my sanity, and journal… a lot. Doing all of this feels good, like I’m meant to be here, but it’s foreign and uncomfortable.
The move forced me to push a lot of familiar things away. It slashed at my ego – catapulted me into a new life of less money, a smaller home, and less stuff to fill my days.
There are moments where I just want to run away from all these crazy emotions but I know I can’t. I have to stand my ground, build self confidence and believe that I have the courage to become the person I’ve always dreamed of being… even if I’m not 100% sure what that is, yet.
I’d planned to make soup for the blog on Tuesday. It was a horrible day, Tuesday was. The sink broke, my photos looked like crap, I dropped a bowl of completed soup all over the floor, I was unhappy, unbalanced and I just wanted to give up. I lay in a puddle of tears on the floor wishing life just wasn’t so darn difficult.
Then, completely out of the blue, I began singing I Won’t Back Down by Tom Petty. A sat there on the floor of my office with soup all over me just singing my little heart out. If you don’t know the lyrics, check them out. Maybe belting out this song was my heart’s way of telling me I should be the next Canadian Idol star? Or perhaps the message was that I just need to stand my ground, keep on trucking, enjoy the journey that I’m on, stay conscious to my intentions and continue to express what my heart was feeling.
Either way, I’ve come up with a couple of tips on how we can all get in touch with our hearts, connect with our truth, realize our deepest desires…. and become them.
I’d love to know, are you living from your heart? What steps have you taken to get to where you are? Or, what steps do you think you could take to bring more truth to your life?
This entry was tagged: journey to health
HI! I’M LEANNE
Nutrition educator + keto enthusiast. I want to live in a world where every woman loves her body, nourishing fats are enjoyed at every meal, and the word “restriction” isn’t in the dictionary.